I told Dan this morning that for all my eagerness to take him back to Washington, I had some anxieties about parts of it. I'm eager to show him the battlefields, and to introduce him to friends, but I have reservations when it comes to showing him the House of Representatives. My time at the House was some of the most significant and moving portions of my life, but it was also a debilitating crossroad. Up to that point, my entire focus after the age of 18 had been about living a transient, career-driven, solitary life. That's how I had pleasantly envisioned myself. Unpinned, independent, a gringo Sasha Fierce with a passport like Hillary Clinton's. So it has always been beyond strange to me that at the exact moment that I was offered a transient, solitary and amazing independent job in Australia, in a post that would likely eventually lead me back to the Committee, I chose not to follow. I chose a path more pinned, in an act seemingly entirely against my nature and ambiti

My sister Alissa is an avid horror fan. She can watch anything without grimacing. As a kid she used to have these terrible night-terrors, and I don’t know if somehow those desensitized her, or if she is able to watch horror movies in spite of it. I wonder what she thinks. I like most horror movies. I like Zombieland. I enjoyed Resident Evil. I love the ole’ black and white psychological thrillers like Vertigo, the Birds, and my favorite,  The Haunting . The great thing about a horror movie, is that at worst, it can only be awful and torturous for at most, an hour forty five minutes. After that, you pop in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and it’s like it didn’t happen. (Unless you have nightmares that night that an Undead Joey Fatone is chasing you down the aisle of a Greek Orthodox Church. True Story. Ruined *NSYNC for me. ) But this methodology doesn’t apply when I signed on for The Walking Dead on AMC. Instead, they can torture you over several months with the long drawn out zombie ap

While doing some work research, I stumbled onto this nugget of gold!  I'm not entirely sure of the era, but I'm guessing from her Jean Harlow looks that this may have been early 1930s. MISS ETHEL D. HOOK CLAIMS DISTINCTIVE TITLE Miss E. D. “Ethel” Hook, of Sacramento, California, insofar as we know, enjoys the distinction of being the only woman in the United States, to purchase gold in commercial quantities. This blond, young woman, is employed by the California MacVan Company, and is given full authority by her employer, A. E. Vandercook, to buy gold in any quantity. Grizzled old men who have aged in the hills hunting gold, young fellows getting their first callouses, and even women- turned miners to boost family finances— they’re all familiar to her. Sometimes they come with a great deal of gold, and go away with a great deal of money, sometimes they bring as little as 15 cents worth of gold. Almost two years ago, Vandercook wanted a secretary, who could learn the

Sometimes as I go about my day, or my week, I start to envision my life as it might be symbolically represented by priceless works of art. Like, sometimes I get on the scale, and I feel like a fatty, and I try to reframe the moment through Botticelli , as if I were a perfect modern representation of the ideal 15th century woman. (which for better or worse, I am.)  Occassionally, once that painting is in my brain it can set the tone for the future, and often times, it's set by one of my favorite artists, Goya. The great thing about Goya, is that he started life extremely optomistic, and ended it extremely disturbed. So practically any moment in a person's life could be symbolically represented by Goya. He runs the gammit. Last week, I would sum up my existence with this late Goya work: I couldn't say for sure if I'm the poor sap getting eaten by a deranged monster, or if I was the deranged monster eating others for breakfast (a la my mechanic, the insurance company

Today I am just plum tuckered out after a knock down drag out fight with my mechanic, and making the subsequent dozens of calls to my insurance, the other guy's insurance, the new mechanic, claims adjustors, and of course, to my dad. While my father may live 800 miles away, having him in the automotive loop is good, and frankly, even at the age of 25.92, I still like knowing that if things get messy I can still send in the scary sounding dad to scare the crap out of someone who thinks they can take advantage of me. In the end, he's taught me so well that I seem to be able to take care of myself, and thoroughly scare the crap out of someone on my own if necessary. I don't like to be mean, and it's probably not how the Dalai Lama would handle it if HE had hit a dump truck's drive shaft on the interstate. But you know what? No one ever thinks to take advantage of His Holiness. And certainly not auto mechanics. Now a cute wittle thing like me in a business skirt and h

If the accident I'd been in on I-15 yesterday had been my final reckoning, it would have been deeply and profoundly unjust in every imaginable way. A newlywed, a new homeowner, a bright young little thing with ambition to change the world and sing songs to ponies and annoy her cat as much as he annoys her. I hope that's what you'd say, anyway, when singing my restful praises. But in one, small, fraction of a minutia sort of way, it would have been just timing. You see, as my car launched momentarily in the air after running over the drive train in the slow lane of I-15, I had a flash of a thought. It only lasted perhaps 1/100 of a second before I returned to thinking about how to control my car, how to get over to the side of the freeway, whether or not my vehicle was about to explode, etc., but I did clearly think to myself "If I die, my last meal on earth would be a corn dog. How nice."  It's true. Earlier that day, I devoured one of the most delectable

Nothing Says "I love you" Like a Sunrise Trip To Wally-World: Let's Rewind to Last Night: Dan: I think I'm allergic to Splenda Lorraine: Uh, Why? Dan: Because I had some today, and now my throat feels tight and scratchy like when you're getting a cold Lorraine:Are you sure that you're not just getting a cold? Dan: No, this is different. I can tell. Lorraine: mmmk. I'm gonna go take some Emergen-C now. This Morning at 6am: Dan: I have a cold. Lorraine: Uh Huh. Ergo, my trip to wally world to get the man some gummy vitamins (which I am sure he will overdose on) some mocha mint cough drops (which I will probably eat instead of him) and a humidifier, because I think that's what his mom used to do when he was little. My mom used to get me coloring books and crayons, which I meant to get, but Walmart is so damn big I forgot whilst walking through 26 aisles of cold products. Jacksons are dropping like flies, y'all. Group funeral, I'

As you can see from my Opal-ish melodramatic post from yesterday, our tiniest Jackson was quite ill. I tossed and turned all night and couldn’t quite put my finger on what was bothering me, but when I awoke myself at around 5:30, I had a sick feeling in my gut. The cat should have been bothering us all night as he always does, and we usually lock him out of the room at around 3 or 4. But he never came. I looked around the house and finally found him right under our bed, and looking dreadful. I knew instantly that he was sick, and my first instinct was a tummy ache of some sort, but the more I watched, the more I realized it was something much worse than that. His eyes were two different sizes, and it looked as if one side of his face was rather limp. He had a twitch, and it seemed as if his vision and maybe even his coordination was impaired. Having seen a 7 foot tall thoroughbred once do the same thing after sustaining a neurologically damaging injury, I was not comforted by what I sa

Christopher Smart was born in 1722 in Shipbourne, Kent, England. After college, Smart earned a living in London editing and writing copy for periodicals and composing songs for the popular theater. During this time, he became known for his reckless drinking and spending habits; he was arrested for debt in 1747. In the 1750s Smart developed a form of religious mania that compelled him to continuous prayer, and was confined to an institution for nearly all the remainder of his life. Smart is well known for his distinctive and oft anthologized homage to his cat, Jeoffrey. For I will consider my Cat Jeoffrey. For at the first glance of the glory of God in the East he worships in his way. For this is done by wreathing his body seven times round with elegant quickness. For having done duty and received blessing he begins to consider himself. For this he performs in ten degrees. For first he looks upon his forepaws to see if they are clean. For secondly he kicks up behind to

1. I could spread these out, so that in a month when I haven't posted in, well, a month, you'd have something to read, but I kind of like surprising you. 2. Temple Grandin was FUNNY. Really, really, funny. That was the best part of it. I knew when she pointed out how silly it is that algebra is a prerequisite for geometry when they INVENTED geometry first that she and I were destined to be dear friends. Well, I suppose I'm not that lucky, but destined for me to admire her. It was perfect. 3. I had no idea the inspiration for Rainman was a guy from Utah. I learned that last night. 4. Do you think it's okay to be excited about things you know only you are excited about, and your husband chooses to be lovingly supportive of from afar?  I do.  Sometimes I try to convert him to things, but some things are mine. But then I wonder if I'm supposed to be missing him, and wishing he were there with me, and then I feel guilty for not wishing he was there, because I am ev

Tonight is an important night to me, personally and professionally. I'm going to see Temple Grandin speak, who is one of my true heroes for so many reasons. I first read her research on autism in college, not knowing she was autistic until later, I saw her speak about therapeautic riding in a documentary while living in DC 3 years ago, I read her research on humane cattle slaughter when researching it for horse slaughter last year, and most recently, I watched the HBO movie about her life. All of these experiences came to me from different places and for different reasons, but it's almost as if she's been a constant in my life, no matter how much my own life and interests and experiences seem to change. Tonight, I will get to hear her speak in person, and I will get to applaud her life and her ambition and her contribution. Temple Grandin has probably done more for the face of autism than any other person alive, and made more positive changes for her industry than any ot

Let's just say that if Halloween were the middle east peace process, Dan and I would be begrudgingly shaking hands between a Nobel Peace Prize Winner. I feel about Halloween the way Dan feels about Thanksgiving, and vice versa.  Halloween might be my favorite holiday, and Thanksgiving my least favorite. For Dan, it's quite the opposite. But alas, he indulged some of my requests (going to a Halloween party, watching scary movies, putting up cobwebs on the porch) and I agreed to nix some of my preferred activities (no haunted houses, no matching costumes, no ghost hunting in abandoned buildings). Well, a picture is worth a thousand words, right? So I present, "Frida Kahlo" and "Walmart's cheapest cat costume".

This is a milestone. Dan and I have outlasted at LEAST one celebrity marriage! HURRAY!!! I'd like to do some mathematics! Kim and Kris: things in common: names start with the letter "K", have both been on TV. Both known for their anatomical stats. things their marriage had to overcome: living in New York City, tabloid rumors, and Kris having to marry a Kardashian. Cost of Wedding: reportedly $20 million. Duration of Marriage: 72 Days.   cost/time= $277,777.78 per day of marriage. Lorraine and Dan: things in common: inability to resist a char-broiled hamburger, love of the rural american west and history, common religion, and we are often told that we look alike. things our marriage has had to overcome: money, long commutes through suburbia, an inexhaustible cat whose preferred attack time/location is "the sleeping face". cost of wedding: $5,000 duration of marriage: 458 days, and I don't anticipate divorcing tomorrow. cost

1. Sometimes at my job, I stumble onto the public blogs of total strangers. If they are really good, I revisit them later on my own time. CREEPER. 2. I have a cuticle issue. Actually, it wasn't an issue for me, but it's an issue for Dan, so now it's an issue. I ought to have G photograph my cuticle issue for his hands project. 3. I struggle with the fact that my coworkers' TV tastes are profoundly higher than mine. Because, you know, I love the Bachelor. I do. I really do. 4. That probably needed its own confession line. 5. Bless me father, for I have watched the Bachelor and enjoyed it. 6. EVEN THE BACHELOR PAD. (AKA, the Eighth Deadly Sin. Deadly to your BRAINZ anyway.) 7. I live on a diet composed almost exclusively of carbs.  cream of wheat, english muffins, pad thai, and a cookie. That's what I ate yesterday. oh, and some juice?  And a red bull? Is that a carb? Paleo Diets are for Pets. 8. "Is butter a carb?"  9. I get on the KSL Class

I feel like sometimes I go weeks without any good customer services experiences, beyond a gum popping teeny bopper asking me if I want my receipt, like, in the bag or whatever.  So when I have a good experience, it sticks with me. I hope you'll indulge a small series by me shamelessly plugging retailers doing good work,  and I hope that if you're in the market for "stuff", you'll give them your business. (ps- I in no way benefit from bragging about these businesses, I just like them.) Today's Feature: FAB: This is a website that offers discounted prices on select designer clothes, house wares, and art. Most of it is modern, some of it is overpriced, but some of it is incredibly reasonable, and really handy. Such as the iced tea pitcher I got on there for a steal. But where they win is in customer service.  I got a collapsible water bottle from their site about 3 weeks ago, and it hadn't shown up. I hadn't yet gotten to c

Epiphanies, like feeling the presence of God, food in your belly, or Oprah, come and go.  The exact moment that you feel it, you are transcendent, looking above it all.  And then just as quickly the lights dim and the burnt edges of the moment fade as quickly as an UNDO on a horrible photoshop action.  Reality is restored.  But you hold on to that epiphany, that brush with the divine (I suppose this could apply to God or Oprah), that feeling of fullness for as long as you can, to keep in the coffers for the darkness that's to come.  Sadly, so many of my epiphanies come in the most embarrassing of ways. If you've been following my blog since my bravejournal days , you know that I went through this phase with LOST.  Where, living in a studio apartment on the other side of the country, those characters were my closest friends, and we had this one extraordinary thing in common: we were forced to examine the question- if you have lost everything that used to define you, who are

It's hard to post photos of the house under the guise that the house is "done" when there is still so much that I want to do. But where we still have so many critical needs for the house other than "get rid of the ugly but functioning fan in the kitchen" there are some things that I have learned to  live with    ignore really well. Ceiling fan? What ceiling fan?  So, while I present the kitchen in its current state, know that there are more ambitious plans in the works, but that in fact I think it turned out pretty darn cute for the $53 we spent on it. BEFORE:   AFTER: The curtains I got from my friend Vanessa, who was going to donate them. The long ranch table was a gift from my wonderful parents (can you believe how perfectly it fit??) and the chairs I got at DI for $5 each. The ceramics were wedding gifts from my wonderful Aunt and Uncle.  Sunlight ! BEFORE: This is a terrific shot of the horrifying mustard that used to be on the walls. I th

1. Sanitize the house post Food Poisoning Apocalypse 2011. 2. Be photographed in the new pair of stunning boots my mother gave me as an early birthday/sympathy gift for surviving Food Poisoning Apocalypse 2011. 3. Repress all memories of Food Poisoning Apocalypse 2011. 4. Throw away everything in the fridge more than 5 days old. Yes, even the ketchup. 5. Dan says I can't throw away the ketchup, or the mustard. but he insists I get rid of the Vegan Mayo.  6. That is just like a man. 7. Build a bench in the kitchen to go under the window and run along the dining room table. 8. Squeal with delight after completing #7. 9. Somehow convince people to start coming to our front door instead of our kitchen door.  This could take awhile. 10. Find someone to sell me a high fire kiln for a fraction of what it's worth, so I can open the coolest etsy store ever. (so cool that if it's not on the front page of Etsy every day, Kanye West will defy your firewall and appear

After spending nearly an entire week away from work, boredly skimming hours of TV, knitting, reading, coughing, making homemade soup and smoothies, sniffling, doodling, medicating, and sleeping, the Jacksons are finally back to work. We also got into the game Skip-Bo, which I was really excited about, until Dan defeated me twice in games much closer than the Utah v. BYU game Saturday night. (I have to say it like that, because it's the only I can feely okay about it. Yes, I am 5, and yes, that's why Evanses don't play many games. We are not now, and will probably never be mature enough to lose gracefully.) Go Utes. We also got to know our adolescent kitten much better, which is wonderful, because after spending almost a straight week with him, I am fully relieved to know that he is NOT a normal cat as I have feared, and full of weird cat neuroses as I had hoped.  For example, Jeoffrey ONLY drinks the purest of pure waters, preferably from containers made for humans.  Even

I decided to start my very ceremonious and official tour of our new house in the office, mostly because it's the cleanest right now, and because it just happened to have good light coming in the same time that I actually had my camera charged. That's fate, y'all. For some reason the only pictures I have of the office before the update was the ones from the realtor.  The realtor made it look much better than it actually was. there were giant burnt holes in the carpet, the brown paint was washy and cheap and sad and, like the whole house, it had a thick film of dirt and grime from the former tenants.  Before: After: the desk I've had since I was young, our art supplies, Dan's guitar, a fraction of the books (including my Utonians!)  Dan's records, the non-fiction books.  Do you like the wall color? I hope so. You'll be seeing it in 2 more rooms! Also, this is probably the best shot of the original pine floors, which are painted white now, but

Last night Dan and I got to go to an impromptu outdoor concert at Red Butte Garden for the band Thievery Corporation. They're sort of an electric/lounge/reggae group from DC, and I really enjoyed the vibe and variety of their show, but I also enjoyed that the whole thing was free, a bonus to the picture of life, because I didn't feel obligated to participate in the show in any particular way.  I didn't feel like I "had to get my money's worth."  I just took what I liked, did as I pleased, clapped when it was deserved.  After dancing around like a fool much to the giddy embarrassment of Dan, we just sat down and let the people dance around us, while we looked up and talked about the stars.  In the muffling of dancing bodies around our little blanket planet, you could almost forget where you were, and just enjoy being on earth on a summer night. It was a rather perfect moment. The only question I have to add to this is, Why do we get so excited when bands say

Now that I ride a bus for an hour and a half each way, I get to spend time reading. But the past 3 weeks haven't felt like reading. They've felt like an afterschool job that I love. They've felt like intimate meetings with some of the most extraordinary minds who have ever developed themselves, for the greater good. They have felt like walking a mile in a great man's shoes. I've been reading about SPACE. More specifically, the U.S. space program, and not just the astronauts, whose stories are of course amazing but well known.  Instead, I've had the chance to read about the space program through the eyes of the directors, engineers, telemetry guys, guidance systems gurus, and even the security guard of the Mission Control Center.  Every single one of their stories makes it so real, and so powerful, and reading it has truly been a life changing experience.  This morning, my 45 minutes on the bus corresponded perfectly with the 40 minutes that it took Missi

Everytime that I want to use my mom's pie crust recipe (which is the best pie crust recipe) I have to go SEARCHING for it in the only place that I know it exists forever, which is my sister's blog. No offense to mom, but middle sister definitely has this recipe memorized, and I don't think mom memorizes anything anymore. But the farther we get from September 2010 the harder it is for me to find it in the backlogs of blogs.  Which is annoying. So I'm putting it HERE. beware, for this link will take you to the world's best mommyblogger with ADD (which is more charming than anything), the world's most photogenic blogchildren, and the world's best Pie Crust Cookies.  (as well as actual pie crust.)  By the way, this comes about as a result of us picking our Plum Tree last night- AREN'T I SO FREAKING DOMESTIC AND CHARMING?  Less so when I say it in all caps? Good.

Awhile back I got a nice camera to go with all my photographic ambition, and more recently, I've continually forgotten to charge it, or pretty much that it even exists. So that when I went to Austin recently for work, I said, meh, I'll just take my point and shoot, and proceeded to forget to get batteries the entire time I was there.  It's a residual issue for me, the fact that things needs power to run. It's baloney, anyway, I've been running on fumes since April.  beat that, CAMERA THAT HAS ENOUGH BATTERIES TO TELL ME MY BATTERIES ARE EXHAUSTED, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO TAKE ANOTHER PHOTOGRAPH. That's all, the ranting is done. I've sat with it, and I'm over it. Ergo, here is my life the past three weeks brought to you not my a DSLR, not by a point and shoot, not even by an artsy iphone instagram, but by my ENV 2 and all both of its megapixels. (like I'm going to complain that my PHONE can take PICTURES.  that will always be awesome.) The Austin sk